yeah.. it's official!!

so i took the leap and took the nclex this past tuesday. never before have i ever been to the almost panic level of anxiety, but i was almost there on monday night! i couldn't even stay to watch my youngest son's final season baseball game because i was so nervous. amazing how one test will do this to you. arrived at the testing center early.... sure didn't want to be late! lol.
went through the entire ordeal of security measures to enter the testing room... took the test. it cut off at 75 questions and then came several days of nausea, nervousness, lack of concentration, etc until i finally gave in and called the bon to see my results....... i was prepared for the bad news, but they told me that i PASSED! i literally cried lol. cried from relief of all the anxiety i had been feeling the past few days. my nausea instantly disappeared. i felt 100 feet tall. how dare them make me feel like that LOL!

i just find it also amazing that 75 questions determines a person's competency to be a nurse. the questions i had were... well HARD as hell. no doubt about it. i felt like an idiot when i left that place. i had medication questions for drugs i wasn't even sure were in the drug book :) lord knows i had never heard of them.. how was i supposed to tell the nclex people what side effects or interventions to look for/do?? but it is all water under the bridge now. i no longer have to sign my name with RN-A (A = applicant) anymore! i can push forward in my preceptorship toward my goal of working the ICU. I externed in there for 9 months, and was hoping to get a job in there after school, but unfortunately, my manager, and probably wisely so, does not hire new graduates to work in the unit. so i will do my time in med-surg. learn my time management, charting, and so on, so that i can move my career forward. i owe them at least 6 months on the floor until i can change positions, but if i do have give my employer 1 year for certain.

i would entertain the possibility of working in the ER, but there are some things that just simply gross me out... like protruding eyeballs for one lol. but other than that, i know i would do much better with a faster paced environment. so we will see where the future takes me. i just know that there are several places i would entertain the thought of working and some places i have absolutely no interest in working. now that i am officially an RN, i hope many doors open for me wherever i choose to land.